In every life we have missions which the supreme being we call God put us here to do. Once we complete the missions we were assigned when placed on earth, we start to fade from existence and head back to from which we came. It is in finding the mission needed to complete life that we find truths, honesty, justice and necessary ways of going peacefully. My parents God rest their souls died of cancer at 55 and 59 and my step-father went at 59 also. My Grandfather died of cancer at 70 in a nursing home, am I next I don’t know for sure but the hacking has begun, my breathing gets whiny at times and I get weak and tired. My cat scans show shadows in my lungs and who knows what may come next, but I write because I feel it is my way of saying what needs to be said before I go anywhere. I am a stubborn bastard, I did what I always said was right, and thought needed to be right, but, I can’t change people’s minds and the facts that hurt me most.
I have already told those closest to me, what I wish to happen if i die, no expenses for anyone at all, have the U.S. Navy cremate me, place my ashes in an urn, take me to the middle of the ocean and lay my ashes on the ocean on which I served for 12 years. I don’t want medications, pain relief, or kept alive if my time has come I wish to go in peace is all. Soon I will face further tests to see what is in my lungs and what the Veteran’s Hospital can do for me, if it is beyond overcoming I will accept my fate is all, and return to where I was sent from in peace because I did all I can do for myself, those I Love and more! Acceptance is all I have left isn’t it? If the Navy gives a flag for my death and the time I served I wish it to go to the youngest Grandson period.